Amy Winter
He left three days after our second child was born to visit his mother in Brazil. He never came back. That was twelve years ago.
My whole life changed — drastically. But it was not over. I always had the dream of meeting "Mr. Right," getting married, having two wonderful children and making lots of money. I found out fast that dreams don't always happen like we think they will. There are many obstacles, challenges, and choices in the path towards fulfilling our dreams. After I came to the realization that my husband was not returning from Brazil, I changed my course in life. This was where my life began anew.
In my care and keep were my beautiful children, Michel and Aaron. Michel, at the time was four years old. An extremely active, developmentally and mentally challenged little girl with a beautiful smile and zest for life, she needed so much loving care and truly required 100 percent of my time. Aaron was a demanding infant; he wanted 100 percent also. After all, I was now the mother and father of the family. I had to do everything that a mother does as well as a father to make sure that my children had the best life possible.
Then there was the matter of working to support these babies; that was another 100 percent. So, I had to formulate a plan to include all 100 percent(s) into my life!
The most urgent concern was a job and day care. Although I was a graduate from Michigan State University, this wasn't the time for me to be selective. I needed a job. My "new career" began with a position as a photo manager with the Auto Trader magazine. The hours were decent; the pay was mediocre; but it was enough to pay the basic bills and a nice neighbor who cared for my children. Weekends and evenings were spent with special care, doctor's appointments and therapies for my special needs daughter, while giving my son the attention he demanded. What was it my dad taught me? Anything is possible if you put your mind to it.
Things were beginning to stabilize, but I realized I needed more family support. My immediate family members were all a thousand miles away. I searched for job openings in all the markets close to my sisters and parents. An entry-level position became available in the hometown of my parents and I jumped at the chance to move on and increase my salary. So, we packed up the van and headed to West Virginia driving twenty-two hours with two small children. Now I had great appreciation for the college degree that made it possible to reach higher and higher. The new company (a newspaper) paid my moving expenses and I was on the road to recovery.
After staying with parents for a month, I moved into a little apartment in the same town. Once again, I knew that I needed to push myself further because my children deserve the best life that I can give them. Besides, I am the type of person that always has to push further and further to persevere in life.
In time, I was offered a management job with another newspaper company and a chance to further myself in my career, while still being able to be there for my children. Being involved in every aspect of my children's lives, which includes school, therapies, activities, emotional support and my community are important. This job has been very demanding and has required several transfers and uprooting of my family. We have moved four times in the past nine years and each move has allowed me to advance one step more within the challenging corporate world of newspapers. It has been difficult on my children to move so much. But alas, as the world of newspapers gets more complicated and technologically savvy, I find that I must push that button once again and challenge myself or be left behind.
In today's world, one can't rely on their employer for job security. I have to put myself in the driver's seat and go forward. It is a challenging industry. It is not just print anymore. The newspaper business involves online, digital, podcasts, streaming, and every other technology imaginable. Newspapers are more efficient and technologically savvy and I must be efficient and learn the "new" ways. I must add to my skills or my job could disappear. New and better training and knowledge is a necessity, not just a quest for self fulfillment.
My other driving force is that my children are getting older and require even more time and resources.
So after spending the past fifteen years devoting my entire life to my children and my job, it is evident that I must now set the goals much higher to include an advanced degree. Furthering my education would be an in-your-face lesson to my children that if you persevere through the hard times it will make a stronger person of you. I would be a role model of how additional education pays great dividends. I must take the time to make this happen.
I am the sole financial and physical care provider for my children, so the best possible solution to advancing my education would be to earn an online degree. Between the parenting and work commitments, the only time I have available to learn is at odd times of the day, and online would be perfect to allow me to still tend to my children, fulfill my work duties and learn, all at the same time.
People often ask me how I can be everything to everyone and I reply that it is what I do and I would not trade any experience, good or bad, that I have had on this wonderful journey of my life because it has made me the strong, independent single mother you see today.
It would be a blessing and a fantastic gift to have the financial support of Project Working Mom behind me. I have the drive to do it. (Remember, nothing is impossible).
Benjamin Franklin once said, "If a man empties his purse into his head, no man can take it from him. An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest." I'm ready to take that next step.